DeJa Vu
by MCJMS
Summary: Once again Clarice breaks Shay's heart, leaving Dawson and Severide to pick up the pieces yet again, only this time Dawson decides she needs to come clean to Shay about her own feelings as well. Shay/Dawson Romance with Shay/Severide friendship. T for some language and possible future chapters. Takes place after Episode 1/16


**Severide POV**

I left Rene with her brother so they could catch up, after all they were blood, and even though I knew that her family couldn't have missed her all that much more then I did, I had spent the last hour with her and needed a little time to sort out my own feelings. As I drove away, I couldn't help but feel a sense of pride for bringing a family back together. I had no idea what would happen with me and her from here, if anything at all, but that didn't change the fact that at least now she was back with her family where she belonged. I picked up my phone to call Shay to see how everything had gone with her, Clarice and the new apartment.

Missed Call - Leslie Shay

Missed Call - Leslie Shay

Voicemail - Leslie Shay

_They must have signed the paperwork. _I thought to myself, assuming that Shay had called me out of excitement to tell me about it. I didn't even bother to play the voicemail, I just called her to see how it had gone. I should have listened to the message…

"Hello" She answered, sounding half drunk, half defeated

"Shay?" I barely recognized her voice since I had been expecting that shrieky voiced happy Shay. Not the broken down version of Shay who Clarice left behind for Dawson and me to put back together when she split on her a few years ago. _Shit, Clarice couldn't have done that to her again, could she? _

"She's gone, Severide, she's going to New York with the baby" Shay confirmed what I was worried about

"What? What the hell happened?"

"She told me when we were just gonna sign the papers on the new place"

"Damn, Shay, I don't even know what to say…where are you?"

"I don't get why she couldn't see that I loved her!"

"Have you been drinking?"

"Little bit" she answered, slurring her words more then someone who had just drank 'a little'

"Where are you?"

"She wasn't all bad…" Shay was obviously suffering from her usual alcohol induced ADD

"I know….Shay where are you?"

"Walking home…I'll see you there later"

With that she hung up, I really didn't want her walking home drunk alone after having such a shitty night but it's not like I could change her mind. Even sober she was stubborn as hell, not that I'm one who should talk.

* * *

"I'm going to bed" Shay announced as soon as she walked into the apartment

"What? You don't wanna talk or something?"

"What's there to talk about, Kelly?"

"You're kidding, right?" I asked, really wanting to hear what had happened but not wanting to push the issue

"Look, I'm drunk…like really drunk…I just wanna lay down and sleep..preferably for a couple weeks"

I nodded "Alright….you need anything I'll be in my room"

She thanked me and headed upstairs. I grabbed a beer and made my way up to my room a short time later to watch the end of the game. Once the game ended I was flipping channels and during the silence in between channels I could hear what sounded like Shay crying in her room. I really didn't know how to handle that. Shay's like a sister to me, I love her, but I'm not exactly the best at comforting people and I didn't want to do something stupid. Plus, knowing Shay, she wouldn't want anyone to see her cry…other then Dawson at least. _Dawson, that's it. I need to let Dawson know what's going on_. I picked up my phone to text her and again had a bunch of missed calls, this time from Dawson who obviously was pretty desperate to get in contact with me. I figured Shay had probably turned her phone off and she had no other way to find out what was going on then to go through me

I called Dawson and she answered after just one ring.

"Kelly what the hell?! I've been trying to get in touch with you all night!" She practically growled as soon as picking up

"I'm sorry my phone must have been on silent…"

"Christ, I must have called you 10 times…What's going on with Shay? Is she home?"

"Yeah she's home"

"Did she tell you what happened?"

"Not really she didn't want to talk…just went to her room"

"Well I'm like three blocks away…let me in when I get there"

"Okay" I answered trying to hide the fact that I was suddenly, surprisingly intimidated by her. After hanging up I went downstairs to wait for her, I didn't want to be at the other end of her rage. Dawson and Shay were two women I would never want to have mad at me, not only because I obviously cared about them, but because they could probably kick my ass if they really wanted to (even though I'll deny that until the day i die)

After a few minutes I saw her coming up the front steps and unlocked the door for her

"Shay in her room?" She asked, barely looking at me and not even waiting for my answer before going upstairs and heading to Shay's room

* * *

**Dawson POV**

"Shay in her room?" I asked, but didn't bother to wait for his answer as I made my way upstairs to her room

"Yeah" He called after me. I wasn't mad at Severide, just frustrated that Shay's phone was off and I had no other way to contact her. We had been working on the bar when she called me a few times, but I had left my phone in my car and had no idea until a few hours later when we finally finished up for the night after opening the safe. I _was _mad at Clarice though, furious in fact. Shay deserved better, and I honestly knew Clarice would screw her again in the end when they got back together, but Shay was giving it a try and I couldn't bring myself to shatter Shay's hopes, especially with the baby involved.

I knocked on her door "Shay. It's me. Dawson…I came to check on you"

The door opened slowly and Shay was standing there wiping her eyes, it was obvious she had been crying all night. Her eyes were swollen and red, her face flushed and her hair was a disheveled mess.

"Hey" she sniffled "You didn't have to do this"

"Yes I did….C'mon you're my partner, you'd do the same for me"

She forced a smile and stepped aside so I could enter, then closed the door behind me. Wet sat on her bed and she explained to me what had happened, how Clarice told her just as they were preparing to sign the papers for a new apartment, that she was taking the baby and moving to New York. Hearing the details made me want to kill Clarice more then ever, but I bit my tongue knowing that this wasn't the time to rip into Clarice's lack of character.

"You were right, you know" Shay said after a brief silence

I looked up at her "About what?"

"You never trusted Clarice, did you?"

"I…" I hesitated

"Be honest" she said looking at the floor, a tear

I sighed "No…I never trusted her…but you can't blame yourself. You loved her, and you loved that baby"

She nodded, a single tear rolling down her cheek. It broke my heart to see her like this, Shay didn't deserve this, hell no one did, but especially not Shay

"You know…when she came back around, I didn't want to give her a chance…"

I nodded silently, placing my hand on her shoulder and rubbing my against her collarbone softly

"….then she said that…this baby should have been ours and…I don't know…I softened up"

Hearing that Clarice would use that baby as a pawn in her game didn't surprise me at all, she had no morals, but it infuriated me.

"She said that?" I asked, trying my best to not let on how angry I now was with Clarice

Shay nodded "Yeah"

I shook my head "Leslie, I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this"

She looked up at me, her eyes that I could never figure out the real color of (blue/green/grey?) filling with tears

"What's wrong with me?" she asked

"Aww, sweetie there's nothing wrong with you" I assured her, taking her into my arms as she buried her face in my shoulder "Nothing at all, don't think that way"

"There has to be something" she said in between sobs, I held her tight to my body and rubbed her back trying my best to comfort her, but at a loss for words for the moment. Shay couldn't possibly think there was something wrong with her, could she? She was perfect, every single characteristic of hers, was a characteristic I would look for in someone I would date. Even more then Casey and Mills, she had the exact personality I was attracted to. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have a girl crush on her pretty much since we started working together, and it was probably even more then just a crush, but I couldn't admit that to her…because I couldn't even fully admit it to myself.

"What's wrong with me?" she asked again

"Nothing, not a damn thing…you're perfect just the way you are, Leslie"

She lifted her head from my shoulder and looked up at me

"Why do you have to be straight?" she asked, I could tell it was at least partially the alcohol speaking, and I knew she was in a vulnerable state, but I couldn't hide the truth anymore. It was as if I was no longer in control of myself and I was just watching from the outside as I began to pour my heart out to her

"Leslie…I know this isn't the right time for this, with what you just went through and all…but you know aside from the obvious reasons, why I disliked Clarice so much?"

She shook her head no before nestling her forehead against my shoulder again

"Because I was jealous of her" I said, still feeling like I wasn't in control of my own words or actions "Because part of me…wished I was with you"

She looked up at me, her eyes wide, confused and almost dry of tears suddenly, raising an eyebrow "Don't fuck with me, Gabby. I'm drunk and fragile"

"I'm not…I would never fuck with you like that…I love you….and honestly, I think I'm in love with you" I said leaning my forehead against hers, i continued in a near whisper "I'm sorry…I know this isn't the right time"

"You….your in love with me?" she asked lifting my chin with her forefinger and looking into my eyes as if she was gazing straight into my soul

I nodded "Yeah…I am"

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth "If this is a joke, I'm going to kill you"

I bit my lower lip "It's not…it's the truth"

She placed her hand on the side of my face, guiding me toward her lips. She kissed me softly, and I reciprocated. After a few seconds, she pulled back

"I love you, Gabby…I have for a long time" she said, a smile spread across her face as she leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead

I closed my eyes as she leaned her forehead against mine, and felt every fear and worry I had about finally telling Shay the truth slip away. The truth was on the table now, and she felt the same way, I've never really believed much in the 'story book ending' that most girls seem to dream about, and I knew Shay felt the same way I did on that, however, suddenly here we were, writing the first chapter of our very own storybook


End file.
